J e r e m y R y a n

another week of sch is over... still idling around, bumming with no aim in life... as usual... or do i have something to look for now? hmmm, very contridicting it seems. actually i'm looking forward to something... i'm changing once again... somewhere out there, i'm drawn to somebody... we are not perfect, neither am i... the rubber band story about making it too tight or loose is running about in my head... this is bad... do i always have to look & think about the cons before i make a decision? or is it plainly pride & fear of rejection cause me to run a little back to my own world... however hard i think about it, i'm certainly sure that something has developed for a certain someone, just that... this time around it is very different... dun ask me why... i might not be able to answer u... how can the mind & heart just switched so fast? u might think, but wat if i tell u that i havent been honest with everyone? what does that make me?...? watever fuck ppl say, i dun give a damn... cause i'm sure i'm highly interested & attracted to someone right now.... *sigh* that was alot of air let out man...

but to general issues... yes sista, i read ur msg... wat i want for a present? actually, if u spent ur money wisely on urself would be the best. u dun have to get anything for me... although how i yearn 2 pairs of shoes this year... 1 is a adidas ROM, super old school with the red stripes that is a little extinct & a pair of brown leather shoes, slightly casual will do... haha. oh yeah sis, if u r reading this, ur bro is a FAT ass now. & u should know too. i have a slight problem fitting into size 32 now... this is bad!! i want back my 6 pack. levis 512 is not a bad idea too... haha. no la, up to u. get me wat u like. i'm very cincai. as i love gifts or presents in any size & form.

bros, wat have u been up to man? never hear from alfat for a long time... dun tell me DOTA has taken control over the world! cause my classmates are now playing DOTA too... highly addictive game... fat, we outta come out to chill soon aight? time for brunch now... tataz.

posted by Jeremy Ryan @ 2:22 PM

it's been a decade since i last bought a cd. Savage Garden's first album. never regretted buying this disc. the songs were good, meaningful shit that i can relate to. anyway, it's not all about the cd shit.... 6th week of sch. yet i still dunno a single fuck. roflmao. hasnt it been always the case? more importantly, live life to the fullest man! enjoy every single bit that u're going through. it will make u think life is not so much a bitch afterall... imagine having chicken feet noodle & chee cheong fun late at night! wonderful. this is wat i live for. heng blk 107 near my hse, no need to walk so far... sigh. 5 years single & going strong. my life isnt much about love anyway. perhaps 10%? anyway, JR seldom blog about his love shit, cause he got none! haha. the night just started yet i have to sleep... cb. but the good thing is... i din't drink today! since sch started, i've been drinking everymonday, machiam a routine... but i love it la. ok man, ciaos.

posted by Jeremy Ryan @ 1:39 AM

FUCK THOSE PPL WHO GOT FUCKING BIG MOUTHS BUT FUCKING NO BRAINS!!

highlight of the night. i'm fucking broke that i might have to sell my fucking ass. $15.75 is all i left. fucking pathetic. today was horrible. fucking singaporeans. all u ppl know is to shop & shop til you drop. ccb... however the most fustrating thing is... the topic $. someone out there got something to fuck about me, y don't the ppl fuck me in my face. knn. so owing a few bucks is a fucking big deal? there are some ppl out there who can ask me this question, "siao eh, u no more petrol liao, come la go pump, i chut for you." CCB WTF WILL TELL U THIS? u wait long. for me to have such frds who can offer that W/O me asking, is a bliss. those ppl who only know how to enjoy, makes the most noise. nabei cheebye. when ppl relaxing, enjoying the comfort then won't ask u anything else u know... but when they got no $ or a small fuck thing, they start kb until machiam their whole family die.

smlj?! i dunno how long i never ask anyone about petrol thing. no wonder wat my older friends say is true. when u got car or watever, ppl ask u long pang, u dun want, they say u niao. u long liao, u will ask them pay meh? lanjiao the world is like that man. kb all u ppl want la, i dun give a fuck. downright pathetic. imagine, u talk so much... but have u considered how much 1 fucking litre of petrol cost now? $1.50 ok? knn, full tank or watever still money right? then wtf? i also got my own bills to pay mah. if anybody thinks i'm rich, hey, FUCK UR MOM. simple.

dun wanna talk liao la. knn, if ppl think i chut sport? so be it. got balls u say in front of me, dun talk behind my fucking back. PU BOR KIAS.

posted by Jeremy Ryan @ 9:10 PM

there are many stages in life that all have to go through. everything is done step by step. once you fall, it may take time to pull urself up, but remember, die die also pull urself up & move on. cause you can think of pa reverse gear forever. right? have fun whenever u want to. bear in mind, the responsibilites that come along the fun. everything has a price to pay. no one can enjoy & be carefree. surely setbacks will hit you hard, stress will build up. everyone knows this saying, "failure is the mother of success" failing is hard w/o a doubt. taking advantage of it & being better, improving yourself is the beginning of the success that will come eventually. all shit applies; $, BGR, family & so on. although each individual behaves differently but we're still human afterall... sweet dreams to all. wake up smiling happily! nitey nites :O zZz

posted by Jeremy Ryan @ 4:39 AM

somewhere inside me, i'm feeling something. can't describe it now, cause i'm not so sure of it myself. all i can say is... never say never as nothing is impossible. you know what i mean, don't you? what's it all about... good night.

posted by Jeremy Ryan @ 11:53 PM

BGR.

disclaimer: this is just my own view. not pin pointing or zeroing to anyone in particular. thank you.

how come some ppl fall in love so easily... they will take all the hassle & trouble to forget about their pathetic sour ex relationship, however sink into a brand new one... are we meant to be like this? i simply dun understand why they will cry, whine, make a big issue... spend so much time just to forget or try to patch back... BUT they can just move on easily into another person just like that... w/o anyone realising. scary? perhaps its the wrong word to use. but is it all worth it? i mean, forgetting someone who you spend time with to be with someone new. what goes around, comes around.

the best case scenario: A - guy B - couple's frd C- girl. A & C are together for a period of time already. however there's always loopholes & ups & downs. A & C confides in B. so, after all the stupid nonsense, they broke up. oooh, how saddening. ROFL. then the healing part starts... C starts to get sad, paranoid & all the fuck happens. then, out of the blue.... B becomes with C! weee. thats the best part. B & C can fuck ard this & that, however C still cant forget A! muahaha, therefore, B & C start talking lesser & the whole cycle keep going on & on... see & hear also tao tia.

why do A B C wanna choose this path? i mean, wu lian bo lian kua hian hian for christ sake. pls know that, everything you do, there are pros & cons. u have enjoy the sex for hrs but cry for days. is it worth it? u can hold her hand, hug her ass, squeeze her boobs & she can blow u while u wanna sleep. u call this love? i seriously dont think so. i think the only time when a person can say i love you to another is when they have Grandchildren & a big happy family together. i may sound really crude & not understanding in some ways, but wtf, it is my blog & i can say every god damn thing i want. wtf can stop me? if u think u can, try lor. i'll be waiting =)

don't wanna type liao la. thats y i prefer driving alone, chilling, drinking all alone. call me a loner if you want, but things do happen for a reason. i'm contradicting myself now; cause at times i dun like driving alone. of course i hope there's someone beside me. but... u know... this is life, it's a bitch. good night.

"all i want.. is a little piece of heaven"

posted by Jeremy Ryan @ 12:30 AM

I gotta take a little time
A little time to think things over
I better read between the lines
In case I need it when I'm older

Now this mountain I must climb
Feels like a world upon my shoulders
I through the clouds I see love shine
It keeps me warm as life grows colder

In my life there's been heartache and pain
I don't know if I can face it again
Can't stop now, I've traveled so far
To change this lonely life

I wanna know what love is
I want you to show me
I wanna feel what love is
I know you can show me

I'm gonna take a little time
A little time to look around me
I've got nowhere left to hide
It looks like love has finally found me

In my life there's been heartache and pain
I don't know if I can face it again
I can't stop now, I've traveled so far
To change this lonely life

Let's talk about love
I wanna know what love is, the love that you feel inside
I want you to show me, and I'm feeling so much love
I wanna feel what love is, no, you just cannot hide
I know you can show me

posted by Jeremy Ryan @ 3:50 AM

really. atmosphere plays a part. the surroundings... suddenly at the 4th week, i'm stressed up for reports, projects & other fuck. nbcb. y ah. whats with stressing myself out... i don't get it. usually i'll wait until the 16th week last 3 days & i'll start worrying, not NOW. hong kan la. mai chap siao yi... the temperature in my room is just fine man... 20deg. actually, got alot of things to say, but since the mood so slack jack with class 95 & alicia keys, time for me to lights out....

oh wait, this sentence is true : Better more friends than enemies. but what if, u have 100 friends & yet perhaps maybe 2 have your back. meaning, the really understand u as a friend & know how to take shit & enjoy with u. so what's the point of having so many friends who actually is just a fake... honestly, let me ask u ppl, scroll ur phonebook. ask urself, who can i go to when i'm in need of someone?

good night.

posted by Jeremy Ryan @ 1:52 AM

had a swim at the club just now. had a headache. *ouch*

posted by Jeremy Ryan @ 11:15 PM

Happy New Year 2005!!

just got back from sentosa. this year's nation countdown was quite pa-the-tic. it was more like a singapore idol countdown. fucked up. i aint interested in TauPok, Tau Suan or watever fuck is. maybe only interested in Maia. coz she's H O T... the TsSssssunami overshadowed all celebrations. aiya, the world long long 1 time kena this shit is good also mah. how can 24/7 peaceful... u may say i'm crazy, but i think it's pure retribution. anyway, what is over, is over. its now 2005. ya hear me?! so i thought of my resolutions rleady...

1. try or stop drink-driving. although i can drink & drive perfectly!! (wah knn, sibei hao lian!) but nowadays the TP very high tech, cannot play play liao... ;)

2. treat everyone whom i love, respect & care more than how i usually do... wah... how can JR so wei da? roflmao

3. cut down on both smokin' & drinkin'. so young only... still havent try alot of things leh!

4. spend money wisely. this is impt man! i have to do it.

5. think more in my actions & wat i speak, have to be mature liao... this year hitting the big 20. Two liao leh!! no more siao lian kei. is lao lian liao.

6. stop suaning ppl? hahaha, can't help it though... but i'll try to suan lesser :D

7. pass all my modules with 90% my OWN effort... my classmates should know wat i mean. heh

8. stop craving for perfection. cause no one is perfect including me (duh)

9. exercise more!! i miss my 6 packs. =)

10. last but not least, fuck more ppl who havent wake up from their dreamworld. get realistic fuckers. stop acking like the whole world owns U a living.

yeah, that agar sums it up. waiting for my hair to dry & off to bed. no wanking for 2005! muahahaha hope no one reads this entry. i got a strange feeling... i might just meet someone new or actually be with someone whom i know... i sorta had a dream about it last night... bo bao la. love love love; no $ no one will want... no looks but got $ nvm. they will crumble at LV or Gucci. no $ but got looks, they will still hold ur hand & kiss ur ass! a very Good Morning 2005!! enjoy the new year with a big bang...

posted by Jeremy Ryan @ 7:12 AM