Tuesday, July 20, 2004

its never pays doesnt it? to have a big heart. to try to make everything simple. to avoid ppl to misunderstand ur actions. being too kind always end up in u getting labelled as the baddest ass on earth. good guys end up last. when u wanna do something to let everyone else know u are actually being true, u get slammed back so hard in the face which in most ocassions no one gets back up. u know, when u put ur heart n soul into something & turns out the ppl u treasure & love thinks u're nothing but a piece of crap, it feels so 'rewarding'. then u stop & pause. is everything worth it? is she the girl i'm willing to give up everything for? is he or she the friends that i put all my loyality & friendship to? is this, is that. when will someone really shake ur hand & say this to u, "thanks for being a true friend, for having my back" or "thank you for loving me"? will that ever happen sincerly? when ur so called frds doesnt even have 30mins to 1 hr just to sit down & talk things out with u, despite u being a nice guy, is he someone worth to call frd? honestly, can someone answer me? doesnt everyone is a taker & not a giver? u can say so much things, but do ur actions really prove them? nah, i dun think so. who would step back & give in? perhaps once, twice, but everytime possible? why must u torture urself, enduring shit that ur "frds" give u? why? we are not machines. we have feelings, we think, we do have emotions. giving it all support that a frd need is wat makes friendship last. few months back he can say, i'll support ur ass all the way. next moment, he could be leaving ur ass for good. are all of us just nothing but sinners? ppl sing, talk about gd guys with gd rewards, bad guys with retribution. isnt life a joke to find out, its actually the other way round? well, i'm not too sure, can someone tell me? oh yeah yeah, life sux, everyone loves to say that. but sit down hard, think of it. quite make sense though. cause when life treats u gd, u do something gd, mostly the effects of it is totally misinterpreted by every soul. seriously, by being urself, being a better person, having a heart to fill all sorrow & joy for someone is taken for granted by everyone. u make the effort, it goes down in vain. to all who are reading, lie back & reflect. saying stands still. life isnt fair. u can never understand what a guy or girl is thinking & doing. things happen for a reason? whats the reason? i end my post with this line. everything started of as friends, how much do u expect from the person is far far away & it might not even be 1%.

posted by Jeremy Ryan @ 3:14 AM