Wednesday, May 05, 2004

just had my dinner. still feeling empty though. got this phrase through a friend, Life's a Struggle. to me it seems, just a rollercoaster ride, turning & bending, high, low... seriously time is really important in life. not connecting to the saying "Time is Money". its like time is given to us, therefore i have to make full use of it. i can have 5 hrs on hand. what do i do once i wake up everyday? i'll nua here nua there. laze around like a bum. sleep & yet go back to sleep. smoke, eat, drink. perhaps squeeze time for studies. but ya, this is life. is about living it. trying & going through experiences that i never had before. the feeling of being strongly bonded, the feeling of distant, the feeling of loving someone, the feeling of not being loved, the feeling of rich, the feeling of poor, the feeling of passing, the feeling of failing, the feeling of speeding, the feeling of cornering, the feeling of relaxing, the feeling of life & death to come. what makes a human being so emotional compared to animals is because they are human. we do make mistakes now & thens. no one owes anyone anything. we live our lives the way u want to be. if u want to be a fucked up person, u go ahead. if u want to be mr nice guy, u go ahead. no one can stop anyone from thinking & being who they want. the choose path a, path a will open a.1 or a.2 for u. then it leads on. choose a.1, then a.1.1 & a.1.2 will appear. u know, its like this. logic thinking. yes, i think i'm a safe driver, but who knows? i might just get banged from the back by a drunkard? or mistaken identity? i get screwed? no one knows wat tommorows is install for u. i wish to know wat will my tommorrow be too. but i guess, i cant. everything happenes for a reason. dun have to defend urself or run from it. just that somethings i guess, u will never be able to explain & no one will give a fuck about u. JR, fightning for his life.